Therapy for emotion regulation in San Diego & El Cajon, CA. In-person & online.
Get off the emotional roller coaster and feel in control of your responses.
Do you feel like you want to disappear when your emotions get the best of you?
Whether you tell yourself that you feel “too much” or “too little,” your emotional reactions leave you with a painful thought “something is wrong with me.”
Maybe you…
- Say things you immediately regret in a frustrated tone which fills you with guilt, especially when you see disappointed or hurt expressions on your loved ones faces.
- Feel numb and disconnected from others, isolating yourself while longing for closeness.
- Carry the restless “something bad is going to happen” feeling that consumes you and makes it more difficult to be present in your relationships or to get things done.
- “Overreact” to someone’s seemingly innocent comments and feel embarrassed about your intense response. Being called “too sensitive” makes you feel “not enough.”
- Have mood swings that feel unpredictable, and you have no idea how to stop them or what causes them.
Dealing with your heavy feelings takes up so much of your energy that at the end of the day you feel drained and burned out, not having any motivation to do things that give your life meaning. You might try to protect yourself from these emotions by procrastinating, doom scrolling, or using alcohol and drugs, which sets you back professionally while creating more regret and self-loathing. Or you might seek refuge from your painful feelings in your work and achievements, neglecting self-care, sacrificing your health and relationships in the process.
You don’t set healthy boundaries because you are afraid of someone’s reaction or the feeling of guilt that comes with saying ‘no,’ so your relationships don’t feel as satisfying or safe as you wish.
You notice these patterns and you are ready to change them.
Befriend your emotions and feel more in control.
The ability to effectively regulate emotions and underlying nervous system responses is a true super power! It builds your self-confidence, helps you go after what you want without being paralyzed with fear and self-doubt, and enables you to ask for what you need in relationships. When you accept your emotions and master emotion regulation, you will feel more in control and empowered because you are not going to need other people to make you feel better.
I will help you understand your emotional responses and make sense of them, which will allow you to start developing self-compassion, acceptance, and cut down on negative self-talk.
You will learn powerful strategies to calm your nervous system and strengthen your capacity to work through painful emotions without having to run away from them.
You will increase awareness of the messages from both your mind and your body to effectively navigate difficult social situations and cultivate supportive relationships. If some of your difficulties with emotions are rooted in past painful experiences, we will take the time to process these situations that keep you stuck.
Therapy for emotion regulation can help you…
- Increase your confidence and self-esteem.
- Improve personal and professional relationships.
- Free yourself from persistent feelings of shame or sense of being “not enough.”
- Process your past traumas. The ability to stay with and work through your painful emotions is a prerequisite for any trauma treatment.
- Eliminate the need for harmful habits you developed to avoid painful feelings.
- Communicate your needs effectively to increase their chances of being met.
You don't have to spend your life running away from your painful feelings. Start focusing on moving towards a life that lights you up.
Frequently Asked Questions
Q: What is emotion regulation?
Emotion regulation is the ability to manage and control your emotional responses in different situations. It involves being aware of your emotions, understanding them, and using strategies to either increase or decrease their intensity, depending on the situation.
For example, emotion regulation helps you avoid acting impulsively when upset, share your frustration without aggression, and return to feeling calm after something stressful happens.
Effective emotion regulation helps improve mental health, relationships, and overall well-being.
Q: What is the best therapy for emotion regulation?
The best therapy for emotional regulation depends on your specific needs and underlying causes, but several therapies have proven effective:
- Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) – It teaches mindfulness, distress tolerance, emotional regulation, and interpersonal effectiveness skills.
- Mindfulness-Based Therapy – Focuses on mindfulness techniques to help people stay present, manage emotional reactions, and reduce stress.
- Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) – Useful for trauma-related emotion regulation issues, EMDR helps people process traumatic memories and reduce emotional triggers.
- Somatic Therapy – Focuses on the mind-body connection, helping individuals release stored trauma and regulate emotions through body awareness and physical techniques.
- Emotion-Focused Therapy (EFT) – Helps individuals explore and understand their emotions, making it easier to express and manage feelings in a healthy way.
The right therapy depends on the person’s emotional needs, past experiences, and specific issues with emotion regulation. Together we can find the best approach for you.
Q: What causes emotion regulation issues?
Several factors can impact your ability to regulate emotions, including trauma, chronic stress, mental health issues, substance use, genetics, and brain health.
Difficult experiences when you are young, for instance abuse or neglect, can make it hard to handle emotions later in life. Long-term stress from things like school, work, or challenging relationships can make it tough for your brain to control emotional responses. Problems like anxiety, depression, PTSD, or bipolar disorder can make emotion regulation much more challenging.
Emotion regulation is a skill, so if your caregivers were not able to teach you healthy ways to deal with emotions as a child, you may feel easily overwhelmed and lack the tools to effectively deal with painful feelings. The good news is, it’s never too late to learn this valuable skill!